It's Time To Start Looking At Your Inner Circle!

 I had a friend for many years who we will call W. He was a good dude, always loyal, always down for whatever. Yet, when it was to talk about the future, the next 10 years of life, he was un-motivated. He had no real goals to want to reach, his life was lived day to day. If he had a roof over his head, a single room to eat in, weed to smoke, food for the munchies, and someone to hug at night then he was good. We lived in NYC at the time, and he was not interested in buying a car, and was looking forward to getting called by the housing program "section-8" for almost free living. 

He did not inspire me to find my better self......

I had 3 out of 5 friends in my inner circle that had the same thought pattern, the same view on life in the future. All had jobs that made $12 an hour or less, was receiving food stamps, either late or didn't pay child support, and often asked for the occasional $20 for weed or pizza. When I spoke of wanting to learn new skills, get a better job, improve myself, it was normally met by laughs, and bad jokes. They weren't trying to offend me, but they didn't get why I wanted those things when life can be given to me on the poor man's discount in the future.  W was okay with spending the rest of his life living in low-cost project housing, eating cheap Chinese food (half fried chicken, pork friend rice, egg roll and a can of soda for $5.00), drinking cheap beer, smoking cheap weed, and if need be-paying for the touch of a woman. 

 It was not however, what I wanted. So, I slowly distanced myself from W, and the acquaintances like him for a while. I sought out successful people that I worked with, anyone above a director level. I spent more time with two of my friends that wanted to own businesses and made strong efforts to do so, and paid attention to their hustle. 

I started to read books on complicated subject matter so I can get smarter in the way I thought. I changed the way I dressed by pulling up my pants, tucking in my shirt, wearing a blazer and dress shoes. I stopped getting high on weed. I practiced my vocabulary to meet the business standard. More importantly, I made new friends that were engaged in the same way.

 I was drawn to people who rose up and met the level of living a successful life. People who wanted, who needed to scale by optimizing every aspect of self. I wanted an inner circle of Alpha individuals. Nipsey Hussle said "If you look at the people in your circle and you don't get inspired, you don't have a circle. You have a CAGE."

That is absolutely true! No one wants someone in the pack that wants to be "better than everyone else" when you a part of a low-standard group. Now, if you find yourself in a group that becomes inspired by your desire to rise then that is another story. Years later when I ran into W and the same group of friends, not everyone greeted me with love. W laughed at my clothes and joked on how my car was rented. Yet two friends of W, named X and Y saw my watch and realized that I was on a whole other level. They asked me where did I work at, if they were hiring, and how can they join the Alpha circle? I spent an hour talking about what I did, the things about me that changed, and agreed to follow up with them to offer mentorship. 

As soon as I finished with these two future Alphas, my man W asked me for $20 so he can buy some weed. I broke him off $100 and whispered in his ear "if I did it, you can too. Don't kid yourself..." clueless W looked at me, nodded, said "I feel you man" and went to the Chinese take-out spot. Sadly, I don't talk to W no more, and it wasn't because I looked down on what he wanted. That was his choice, and if he was really happy, then so be it.  I still got love for W, and those like him because of the truth. Not everyone is willing to take that narrow path. Not everyone is willing to make the changes. 

So yeah, you have to look at your inner circle deeply. Ask yourself who is working every day to be better, who is positive and supporting, who can join you on the path to a better life? Who looks at time as the most expensive commodity that cannot EVER be wasted? Those who do not meet those standards should not be in your inner circle, you can demote them to "Facebook friend" status. When you reach that level of status you are aiming for, you can always treat them to dinner when you see them next time.

The Alpha